In today's reality, I often find myself pretending I'm somewhere else. Someone else. Something else. I'm proud, pretty and perfect. Back to reality, I'm constantly screwing up in a world that grows more hateful each day. Back to Dreamland and I'm gorgeous, graceful and glamorous. Back to reality, I'm sitting in my office with the door locked, sobbing into my keyboard, wondering what the fuck am I doing with my life. Back to Dreamland and men are knocking down that locked door to sweep me off my feet and take me far away from here. Back to reality, I'm so numb to the world that I can't even remember how I got home. Back to Dreamland and I hear people calling my name, reaching out to grab my hand, asking to take a picture with them, to sign autographs, flashes of light ... Back to reality, people are calling my name as they break down the door while I slowly slip further and further into the tub. Back to Dreamland, the red carpet has been rolled out, a sash on each arm, all eyes on me. Back to reality, floating in a sea of red, with a slash on each arm ... all eyes on me. Flashes of light, then --
There to not there
And it seems to happen in the blink of an eye
Watching your loved one(s) slip slowly into oblivion is not something I'd wish on my own worst enemy
Becoming an adult is both good and bad
There's growing up, which is followed by (not in any certain order), getting your first kiss, driving, going from your first underpaid job to hopefully a better paying job, traveling the world, meeting Mr or Mrs Right, getting married, starting a family, buying a house, getting a pet, sending your kids to school/college, becoming grandparents, watching your children grow up and growing old with someone, hopefully having all of your hopes, goals and dreams come true before your time is up.
That's the good
The bad ...
Having to say goodbye to people you know, you like, you love
And these goodbyes happen much earlier than you'd like
We may say we're prepared
But how does one really prepare themselves for such an earth shattering event?
Going through hardships, losing faith, losing friends, falling out of love, discovering you found Mr or Mrs Wrong
Getting even older
There's this fear of forgetting everyone
Just going through the motions
Waiting for your body to give up
Days, weeks, months or years after your mind already has
It's a scary thought to know that one day you might not know anything
Knowing this should make us more aware
It should make us more kind and compassionate
It should make us treasure each and every single day
It should make us tell our friends and family that we love them every single day
I've been told on more than one occasion that I'm missing out on something extraordinary because I refuse to get into a relationship. Perhaps I'm taking the glass half full approach. Perhaps I'm being too cynical. Perhaps this. Perhaps that. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps. Some may say I'm bitter. Others may say I'm scared. However, when it really comes down to it, I'm just being a realist. So, here's to keepin' it real in 2017 ya'll.